Emmy Hangover: The Fashion Roundup

Since my Oscar fashion roundup was a relatively big hit for my small blog, I figured I would do the same for television’s big night, the Emmys.  However, as I have mentioned before (frequently), I don’t watch a lot of TV, and wasn’t all that familiar with some of these actresses.  Yes, I have pretensions of being an entertainment writer, but I only watch what I want to watch, and that means lots of Glee and Raising Hope, along with a smattering of Vampire Diaries and as little “reality tv” as I can get away with.  At any rate, the Emmys, like the Oscars, feature a red carpet and lots of dresses to die for, as well as a few that are, well, not so much.  I always check out what other fashion reviewers have to say, and I don’t agree with some, and as always, my opinion is the only one that counts.  Now– for the dresses!

I absolutely love this Oscar De La Renta that Claire Danes has chosen.  Glitzy without being ostentatious, playful without being over the top, and the colors are just ooh. 

Paula Abdul looks amazing in sapphire blue Samine.  The internets turn up lots of hate for this dress.  Are we looking at the same dress, people?   Especially since some of the bloggers bashing it are calling it black.   The gown is exquisitely detailed, it suits Paula perfectly, and balances drama with fun.  As I said, my opinion is the only one that counts.

I have to agree with the hate for this rag Katie Holmes is wearing.  The thing with the Calvin Klein dresses I’ve been seeing this year is that they all look like bathing suits with skirts attached to the bottom just for the hell of it, and in this case, the top is one of those swimsuits your granny wears.  Granny’s is also probably the same color.  In addition, there’s the hair.  Bumpit alert!

Okay, Sofia Vergara’s dress has made me rethink my stance on Vera Wang.  Wang’s designs typically bore me, but not this one.  Can we say wow?  Check out the detailing, the cut, the color.  OMG, it’s awesome.

Then, there is the antithesis of awesome.  Heidi Klum looks like she’s sprouting from a giant moldy head of broccoli.  This disaster was “designed” by Project Runway winner Christian Siriano.  I don’t watch much reality TV, but I understand that Heidi judges on this show?  To Siriano– if this woman is responsible for bringing you to public attention, try not to make her look like a freakin’  rotten vegetable, okay?  Good hair, though, and nice Louboutins.

Cat Deeley’s Monique Lhullier dress is gorgeous, and I seriously want that bag.  Her hair is too messy for this type of gown though.  It’s no crime to leave your hair down, but for heaven’s sake DO something with it.

Ugh, what IS this?  It looks like an old school Quarter Pounder box (back when they came in styrofoam clamshells).  Armani Prive can do some interesting futuristic designs, but this is just fug.  Julianna Margulies should have known better.  Also, what is that stuff on the bodice?  Some kind of Happy Meal toy?  And again, this is hair left down done wrong.

I understand that this is a Real Housewife.  Hell, I am a real housewife and I know that you don’t WEAR upholstery fabric just ’cause you like the color.

Rachael Harris is wearing glasses on the red carpet!!!  OMG, I can’t tell you how much I love her for that.  We spec-wearers need to unite in our hotness!  The dress is by Nicole Miller and it’s great, I like the simple necklace and the hair is nicely styled too– no bed head here.  But the Oliver Peoples glasses are the Look.

I always applaud those who choose bright, unusual colors for the red carpet, and this turquoise Alberta Ferreti goddess gown makes a definite standout of Cobie Smulders of How I Met Your Mother.  This is old-style Hollywood glamor, complete with a 1930s-inspired coif and statement earrings.  I heart the whole look.

Amy Poehler is a funny lady, and a very pretty one, and I don’t understand her love for old-lady clothes.  This dress by Peter Som ages her terribly, and while I like the color, and am pleased that sleeves seem to be making a comeback, this is not the right way to do either.

Martha Plimpton is simply one of the coolest beings on the planet, and has been since Goonies.  This Zac Posen number channels Scarlett O’Hara’s red party dress while flattering Martha in every possible way.

The Good Wife‘s Archie Panjabi is perfect in emerald Angel Sanchez.  Loving the whole look– very polished and elegant.

I’m not sure whether I love or hate Christina Hendricks’ Johanna Johnson dress.  I mean, it’s a stunner.  But it looks like it’s wearing Christina rather than the other way around.  It’s eating her alive.  She’s fading into the wallpaper in it– she looks like floating hair and lips and nothing else.  A different color might have made this work, because it certainly is tailor-made to Christina’s curves (yay for not looking like a stick figure!).  Maybe green or blue.

I love Emily Blunt, but I can’t make myself love the Elie Saab dress she’s wearing– it seems to be adorned with those little tulle rice-bags they used to give out at weddings in the eighties.

Kate Winslet, also in Elie Saab, fares a bit better, but I’m more blown away by her hair and gorgeous accessories than by the dress itself, which is just kinda there.

I like this Blumarine dress on Taraji P. Henson;  it’s not a look everyone can pull off, but she does it.  This is another look which I must disagree with general consensus about.  I’ve seen bloggers calling it a nightgown, but when’s the last time you saw a nightgown that looked this great?  Love her hair too.

Never heard of Georges Hobeika, but his creation for Julia Stiles is wonderful.  Is it gray?  Is it lavender?  It seems to be both, and she looks beautiful in it.  Great hair and great bag, as well.  Some bloggers have wanted a necklace for this look, but in my opinion that would be overkill– it’s perfect as is.

Olivia Munn picked emerald green Carolina Herrera and I love the color on her.  Not too sure about those shoes, though.

Kelly Osbourne rocks this J Mendel dress, but why is her hair white?

Opinions seem sharply divided on Melissa McCarthy’s self-designed purple dress.  I love the color, but speaking as a fellow woman of size, I am not too thrilled with the cut.  For myself, I would have chosen a longer waistline and a different skirt length– either go short or go ballgown.  The necklace is a nice  touch.

Lots of red on the red carpet tonight, but Kerry Washington’s unusual Zuhair Murad design really stood out.  Featuring a semi-sheer skirt and lots of glitz, this dress is nothing short of amazing and needs no accessorizing– the matching clutch and tiny earrings are all that’s needed.

I haven’t been able to find out who designed Eva LaRue’s peach chiffon, bejeweled gown.  It looks great but would’ve looked nicer if Eva had laid off the bronzer.  No stranger to spray-tan accidents myself, I can feel her pain and commend her for still rockin’ it.

Paz de la Huerta of Boardwalk Empire– I’m sorry, but you just look really, really bad.  What the hell is up with your dress?  Is it really cut that way or are you just walking around pulling it up to show off your leg like Bugs Bunny in drag?  The shoes look like they’re made of blue hemp, those earrings look like she could pick up radio signals, and the weird beige lipstick– oh, the humanity!  Um, well, interesting hair, but that’s the only kind thing I can say.

Elie Saab can make a lovely dress– but Evan Rachel Wood got the best one there, and all the other Saab wearers got slim pickings.  Dramatic, glam, retro– call it what you will, it’s killer awesome, and so is her hair. One of the night’s best.

Best of the best.  The Vampire Diaries’ Nina Dobrev is just perfect.  So epically awesome is this Donna Karan dress, and her whole look, that there are almost no words, but I must try.  The dress has it all:  brilliant color, flawless fit and form, visual pop in the geometric train and structured bodice.  Nina’s hair and makeup are also perfection, as are the necklace and clutch.  God, I wish I could look like that.  Just for one day, or even one hour, of my life.

Then there are the ladies of Glee, who pulled off widely divergent looks with varying degrees of success.

Amber Riley is my hero.  This dress is amazing on her!  It’s young, it’s flattering, it’s such a great color!

Naya Rivera looks great in black.  In fact, she would look great in a potato sack.  Does anyone know who designed this gown?  Love it.

Dianna Agron is usually spot-on on the red carpet, but while I love the color of this Roksanda Ilincic dress, I can’t like the design.  It looks like a bedsheet.

Dot-Marie Jones pulls off the menswear look very well, and honestly, would you have expected any different from Coach Bieste?

Gwyneth Paltrow made waves on Glee as Holly Holiday, and she makes waves on the red carpet too in this midriff-baring Pucci.  I like the exotic vibe she exudes here.

I love me some Heather Morris, but I’m of two minds about her dress.  It’s really different, and suits her personality, but the color isn’t doing her any favors– it’s that peculiar shade of grape gum that always makes me feel vaguely headachey, and in this case washes out her complexion.  Also– another Bumpit sighting!

Jayma Mays plays to her china-doll looks in this Zuhair Murad creation.  Another dress getting bashed in the press that I have to get behind.  Not everyone can wear stuff like this, but it’s perfect for her– she looks like a little angel.

I might like Jenna Ushkowitz’ structured black-and-white gown more if she looked like she was happy to be wearing it.

Lea Michele, as always, rocks, here in a fire engine red plunge-back Marchesa.  But am I alone in wishing that Lea would grow her bangs out?  Not a big fan of them.

The hostess of the event, Glee‘s own Sue Sylvester, Jane Lynch, showed off four similar looks over the course of the evening.

The similarity among the gowns is due to the fact that all are courtesy of  designer David Meister.  All of them complement her lanky frame, but my fave is the third one– the color is awesome and I love the twist neck.

There you have it– the best and worst of the Emmy dresses.  As always, feel free to agree or disagree in the comments!

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